GOOD BYE.
So last night, was the night. Eric, my "knight in shinning armor" cut my hair and shaved my head. It was so traumatic for me. He was so good about it though. We set up in my room, I closed the mirror on my vanity so I could not see it being cut off. I could not look at myself. I did not want to see it being cut off. Eric was so gentle. We saved parts of my hair so I can remember what it looked like for the final time. Eric told me I looked good when it was all done. I was thinking he was crazy, as i was sitting there. He told me that you could see the pattern my hair grows in. He talked me through the process. It was cathartic for me to have him being him. I am glad I asked him to do this for me, rather than go to a salon. He was super supportive. He hugged me, and held me when I cried. He said, "noooo" when I finally looked in the mirror and told him I thought I looked ugly, seeing the buzz cut and seeing the scars from my 6 surgeries. My buzz hair was soft and spiky just like his. hehe. Afterwards, we went to dinner. I wore a scarf on my head. It is hard looking at myself with no hair. I look sick. I look like a cancer patient. That scares me. That upsets me. I just try to avoid mirrors. That I am used to. 
Can't wait for this to be done with so I can have my hair start to regrow. I am just ready to kick cancers butt already!
